Living a Full and Meaningful Life - Is Happiness Really the End Goal?
Giving Voice to Other Emotions
Do you ever see some people and think, how are they always so happy? It seems like nothing in life could deflate their spirits or make them upset. They appear to have the secret to a life of happiness. That is what everyone is searching for are they not? The key to happiness. From trying every new meditation practice to reading multiple self-help books, there are numerous voices stating “Here’s how to find happiness”. And despite these attempts, it leaves people feeling even more defeated for not being able to maintain a perpetually blissful state.
It is common for people to feel as though all of their life’s concerns could be solved if only they were happy. However, it seems counterintuitive to have happiness be the only emotional state needed to live a good life. In fact, when we think about what it means to live a full and meaningful life, it implies that life is multidimensional and has a wide range of experiences that make it worthwhile. If the key to a full life was only happiness, why do we even have other emotions?
The truth is that feeling other emotions is just as important as feeling happy emotions. Emotions themselves are temporary and allow us to have a wide range of experiences. For example, think back to the last time you were angry, did you expect to live the rest of your life in anger just because the emotion arose? Or did it subside with some time and action? Such is also true for happiness. Expecting to live life only in happiness is not how our emotions work and can be a fleeting quest. Furthermore, every emotion has its own purpose. Perhaps when you were angry, it was because someone crossed a boundary that was really important to you. In truth, the things that mean the most to us in life often require a range of pleasant and unpleasant feelings.
Learning how to sit with these various emotions can be challenging, especially when they are unwanted. But by shifting how we understand and relate to these emotions, we can be less affected by them.
Harris, R. (2008). The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living: A Guide to ACT. United States: Shambhala.
Avery is a Practicum level therapist, currently completing her Master’s degree in Counselling at City University of Seattle in Calgary. Avery works with children and adults to work through challenges with anxiety, depression, communication and relationship challenges. Avery is passionate about connecting with clients through genuine understanding, acknowledging the intricacies of navigating health care systems, medication, and the experience of being a client or patient as one moves through these challenges.
At Core Psychology, our goal is to help you create a full and meaningful life tailored to your values. Still unsure if therapy is right for you? Book a free 15-minute consultation to see if it feels like a good fit.
